Building life skills for geeks and gamers.
Despite geek and gaming culture gaining popularity over the years, stigma still exists. There is still consequence for being or thinking differently.
Ever been told you're "too old to play games"? Or that you need to "play a real sport"? How about, "You can be geeky, but not too much because it's weird if it's too much."
Geeks and gamers may struggle with the following:
- feeling misunderstood by loved ones and peers
- difficulty connecting with others
- isolation at home, school, or work for their own reasons
- frustrations with having to defend their lifestyle or choices
- being teased for being different
- having arguments because of misunderstandings or being asked to stop playing
- time online or with technology increases dramatically (30-40+ hours/week)
- lying about hours played
- oversleeping or under-sleeping to play games through the day
- quality of work decreases, or motivation to do other things decreases dramatically
- extreme anger outbursts when losing games
- ignoring relationships to use technology or play
Gaming can be a gift and a curse for many, including myself. Seeking balance can be an important aspect of any behavior, even one that gives so much joy and creative beauty.
It can be a great escape, or a chance to be a hero or villain one's always wished of becoming, and it can also help bring people across the globe together for a unified cause. While there are difficult times being different, there are also ways to grow using the very things we love so much!
Our favorite characters can show us our strengths. We can use stories from anime, manga, comics, video games, and books to be our own heroes, and I can join your party to complete quests and raids together. We can build stats that are uniquely yours.
Coaching that is gamer-affirmative.
This approach acknowledges that gaming is an essential part of a person's life. There are real memories created with real people, and the investment of time is very important in honoring when talking about gaming. Gaming can be a person's lifeline to the outside world, a chance to work through issues, and/or opportunity to spark creative exploration.
Learn strategies to balance your interests while honoring your authentic self.
Each person has a unique situation, and here are some things we may be able to work on together:
- Identify and implement strategies to reduce problematic gameplay (insert hobby or behavior here)
- Learn how gaming (or any of your interests) can be strengths in life and when to apply them
- Improve social skills through communication exercises, and developing self awareness
- Learning perspectives of others with homework and activities (yes I assign readings & homework!)
- Build trust with your loved ones and strengthen healthier habits by working on smaller, achievable goals
- Connect with loved ones by expanding on how we all see games or playing together
- Create community through self-acceptance and finding your tribe
Support your geek or gamer through education and quests.
Yes, you can get quests, too! It's important to work with loved ones when possible. If open to collaboration, here's what we can try:
- Parents: learn about developmental stages your child is working through, and how to model emotional regulation and boundaries (I will assign readings & videos)
- Discuss discipline versus punishment and age-appropriate consequences
- Learn about escalation and de-escalation with conflict, language choice, and family rules for problem solving
- Communication and self regulation exercises will be identified and practiced together
- Identify how gaming (or behavior) affects the relationship, what your relationship needs are, the alternatives to getting them met, and compromises (if any)
- Gradually create ritual or family bonding through agreed-upon activities (taking turns to share individual interests)